Saturday, September 08, 2007

rap-a-tap-tap-tap at the door...

Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! Grrrrr....

With skin still embossed from the thread-bare sheet, I stumbled through the artillery of dogs to the door.

'Would you like to buy some magazines for my school?'
'Yeah baby, when do you have to turn this stuff in?'
'Next Thursday'
'Great...can you come back on Tuesday? I get paid on Wednesday & can give you a check.'
'Momma?'
'Yes, honey...we can come back. how are you Skinny?'
'Good, neighbor-lady...How are you?'
'Collectors are calling...you know. My husband saw your husband this morning & he was on his way to the river... you didn't go?'
'Ummmm, no. We divorced last month.'
'Oh, I am sorry. I will pray for you.'
'That's alright honey. Save your prayers for those who really need them. I'm all good.'
'I need to come over more often & talk to you. You have just been talking to the wrong person.'
'What are you talking about?'
'You should have been talking to God!'
'Well neighbor-lady, I don't know who you think I have been talking to...'
'You should talk more with God Skinny'
'I talk to anyone & everyone. In my opinion life is for living, learning & loving...and if you're not doing all 3, then you aren't doing any of them effectively. I've made my choices & I have made mistakes. I'm living, learning & loving. it's all good.'
'But God can cure all. He can work miracles.'
''Getting married was my choice & so was getting divorced. I am not going to pray about that ...I'm living, learning & loving.'
'You should write that down somewhere...'

Am I naive? Can't this 'person' I 'need to talk to' called God be part of me? Can't I skip the whole calling him God thing? Can't what she calls God, I call my heart & soul? Can't reflection on my end be the same as a prayer on hers? Can't my friends & family be considered a community of the church? Can't my choices made, lessons learned, loves shared & life lived be considered a miracle?

I didn't say any of these things to her for three basic reasons.
One~ It's not my place to push my beliefs onto anyone else
Two~Nor did I feel like I needed to validate myself any further.
Three~ I'm just glad she believes. I believe, maybe differently than her, but I believe & I know it's all good.

Hmmm, Living, learning & loving... sounds so satanic, evil & corrupt, doesn't it?

19 comments:

singleton said...

Girl, you keep doing it! We are blessed, you believe, and we are learning....all of us....It's all good, and if it's all good, God is smiling.....

Mel said...

There's the difference between organized religion and spirituality.
You just keep trusting what's worked in your life, what keeps you learning, living and loving.

Seems to me that connectedness is what brings all of us peace--

(((((((((SLB))))))))))))

Beerspitnight said...

"Can't this 'person' I 'need to talk to' called God be part of me?"

the question that I asked myself during every session of CCD (thats what we called sunday school in my roman catholic church - which we attended on tuesdays or wednesdays, hence the absence of "sunday school", but i digress) and their unnerving response that god is much, much more than that, threw me our of the world of the nice and neat version catholic of Everything.
and now i question all.

she said...

great post! great read!

"can't i...?.."

-of course you can!

and funny how some people don't realize that when food is force fed or shoved down our throats

loses it's flavor, texture and nutritional value -just like that

Shimmerrings said...

You did the right thing by not getting caught up in their confusion. You are wise O'Skinny One!

Scott from Oregon said...

You don't thrust your beliefs on others but you do know many who do...

The irony of the religious is that if you turn it around and ask not to have superstition thrust in your face, they feel attacked...

Silly silly.

The truth is simple. There is no evidence a God exists. There is only wishful and magical thinking.

Perhaps God "does" exists, the notion that we could know its mind is also ludicrous...

The miracle is in the fact that we exist at all. The miracle is in knowing that the molecules that made up skinny five years ago ARE NO LONGER IN YOUR BODY.

And yet, you have continuity...

Now THAT is way cool...

kj said...

to my friend skinny:

the answer to all of your questions is as follows:

YES!

:)

skinnylittleblonde said...

Singleton~ Lol, if there is a 'person' called God, and if he is all-knowing then I am sure he is smiling just knowing at least, that I am not about to blame my own choices on him.

Mel~ You are so right! It sometimes seems that here in the bible belt of the USA, that the religious perceive the spiritual to be heathens.

BeerSpit~ Although others seem to seriously question my faith, I rarely do. I have faith in many things, including myself & other people. I don't think I ended up divorced because I didn't 'talk to the right person'(God) but because my husband & I made certain choices...some good, some bad... all reflective of living, loving & learning in one shape or form.

skinnylittleblonde said...

She~
Words so wise, as usual!
If I drink my water out of a tumbler & another out of crystal...it's still water...

Shimmerings~
Lol, this particular lady doesn't seem confused at all... I just don't think she liked or accepted my choices.

Scott~
I absolutely love your comment. Religions, superstitions & miracles. Living. loving & learning.

KJ~ Ty! :)

karma lennon said...

Skinny-it doesn`t sound satanic, just sounds like faith. I have a friend at work, who`s like a mother to me. She is one of the most Christian people I`ve ever met. I however am pagan and studying Wicca right now. So we have differences there but one thing we kind of agree on is that her God and my Goddess are pretty much one in the same. We just go about different ways of worshipping our higher powers. I think it`s basically all the same thing the difference being in how you approach it. So your way is as good and true as any other.

Scott from Oregon said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13NPZ5Nv_fc&mode=related&search=

Dee said...

I'm just wondering why you didn't invite her in for tea & crumpets. After all you just woke up. You didn't want to discuss God, religion, and it's role in your life with your neighbor lady acquaintance? Or was it just because you were running low on crumpets?

Tai said...

Love this post. I do believe that what we call "God" is the best part of ourselves: intuition, instinct, compassion, etc. And when we talk to ourselves, who else are we talking to but God?

kj said...

skinny, stop by my blog and pick up an award you richly deserve!

:)
kj

skinnylittleblonde said...

Karma~ I love the openness that you describe & find closed-mindedness to be stagnating.

Scott~ YouTube kept freezing but I was able to get a good fix on your link. Funny, the night before you added that, sister & I were talking & I was telling her how I believed, given time, scientist would discover 'God' and that it would rock the world of religious ideologists...

Dee~ Lol, I didn't have any crumpets...only stale bread good for the ducks.

Tai~ Lol, love it! When reflecting if I were to view myself as an outside party...I think that would be considered multiple personalities!

KJ~ Thank you... you are so very thoughtful & generous.

SpongyBones said...

Oh the joy of dealing with those who have the answers and know who to turn to for them.

Guess she thinks you recieved the wrong answer somewhere. You little devil you.

I have read stories somewhere about "God" telling people to do things and others thinking they were wrong or didn't get the message right ... hmmmmmm let me think... Noah oh yeah he was one, and another one was, oh yeah Jesus he was one that many thought was getting his mesaages from the wrong source... hmmmmmmm

Live on, learn on, and love on ... sort of sounds like the meaning of the book I read about these dudes in.

eric1313 said...

It's sad. What you told us abou the 'church lady' in this story is actually a psychological allegory.

She was judging things by appearances. She heard the word 'divorce' and thought it must be dreadful for you. That's what prompted her to say that to you. It only makes sense. so, further, it would be dreadful for her. She would worry about what others would think of her for it. She would even ignore herself and her own needs in favor of what "god" tells her to do; ie, ministers and other people from church, since god doesn't really talk to people. The voice of God is silence, and what we feel inside when we are alone and quiet are His words. Call it God or a higher power or whatever you will. Keep listening to that voice and the wise voices of your sisters and friends. They know the path you walk, many of them faced the same things in there life. And they are proud of you and your strength and your resolve to move on the way you have been doing.

I'm one of them.

Sorry to have been away, too. I miss you, but I know you're doing well, by doing all that you can. Living, loving, learning...

and peace will win...

she knows it...

tells me all the time!

and you too.

take care, SLB; don't let the holy rollers get to you. Your golden as it is.

M@ said...

I like the dogs.

Fuzzylogic said...

Sometimes I wonder why is it God has to be defined and confined to something. I truly believe spirituality and God are things we discover inside outselves. ((Skinny)) you are the most wonderful person I have been fortunate to know in this virtual world. Take care dear friend.